Subscriber login Close [x]
remember me
You are not logged in.

Jake Crimmin: A sommelier's diary

Published:  22 April, 2010


First off. Apologies to all of my avid readers for the lack of diary entries this past year. This was mostly down to the same reasons that I've barely been keeping up the running; I'm lazy and I don't get paid for it.

First off. Apologies to all of my avid readers for the lack of diary entries this past year. This was mostly down to the same reasons that I've barely been keeping up the running; I'm lazy and I don't get paid for it.

A good sense of humour is an absolute essential for a sommelier. It can be the weapon, diffuser or entertainer for many a scenario in the restaurant. It's primary deployment, however, is as a defence for any of the many wise cracks coming from your fellow front or back of house staff regarding your role. These attacks aren't entirely unwarranted. Being the person that is the last to arrive for service, the first to leave and that fills this short time with schmoozing, chatting and tasting with guests, one must expect at least a few ripostes from your fellow workers.

Those colleagues that have been busy sweating, stressing, burning, appeasing before polishing off their 14 hour shift whilst you were busy reminiscing about the heady beauty of Mendoza's mountain vineyards in springtime with Mr Lloyd on table 6 will always have underlying resentment for your role.

"How can I get paid to be drunk?" "What do you actually do?" "Do you just make it up as you go along?". These are a few of the favourite snipes fired in my direction and no amount of getting the coffees in or helping with the glass polishing will deflect them. The only time I can come close to making my fellow staff grateful for my presence is when I present them with a magical wine-food combination at a pre-shift brief.

If you're in a Gaucho anytime soon, try a glass of Deseado sweet sparkling torrontes with your Dulce de Leche cheesecake. I've recently taken the guys to sweet, rich and fragrant fizzing caramel heaven by showing them this one and they must now see the purpose of my existence as the jibes have declined... for now.

By the way kids. Don't interpret this as a good example of escaping bullying by giving them your sweets. That will only encourage them. You have to give them the booze too.

Jake Crimmin is head sommelier at Gaucho restaurants

You can follow Jake Crimmin on twitter.

Keywords: